Caged
Wide out of time
wandering plains
Of nowhere
Resistance
Futile brain
Fogged
Fuddled
Cogniscense sags
Caged fawn
Fumbles to frolic
Verily vixen feigns vitality
Praise ‘n’
Plonking platitudes placate
Intolerance crescends
Tomorrow’s new day beckons
Week one of resuming pre-operation hours at work. Week two of commuting into the office two days per week.
Yesterday and this morning, I missed the first bus into town and the usual battle to alight on Adelaide Street. The second bus was thankfully sparsely populated at both the beginning and end of the journeys.
Arriving at my pre-booked desk around 7:20 am, I check in, wander around to locate the chair tagged with my name, unpack the laptop, exercise flexi-tube, mousepad, headset, phone charger cable, and food from my backpack, then retrieve the ergonomic keyboard, water flask, left-hand mouse, fan, cups, and Twinings Lady Grey teabags from my locker. This takes another ten minutes.
Hot-desking frees up resources, and leads to additional time being spent setting up and clearing away each day.
After logging into the laptop, opening the internet and launching cloud-based telephony, timesheet, chat, mail, calendar, notes, calculator, case list, work items, and AI; using TheraPutty and elastic bands to complete my hand exercises; catching up with teammates, both in person and online; and making a cup of tea, it is 8 o’clock — time for breakfast.
I’m much more productive on the three days I work from home.
Yesterday, following an hour participating in team cultural development, completing a proactive case review with my line manager and an external psychologist, and updating case notes, it was time to head off to my own psychology session.
Navigating my wheelie walker — I haven’t named it yet — across the varied textured pathways, ramps, roads, drains, potholes, service and manhole covers, and tactile indicators of Brisbane, my right hand was numb from the vibration. The right carpal release surgery is scheduled for 20 October.
I arrived late for my appointment, in pain from the hip, hot, sweaty and feeling stressed. We discussed this in the session in relation to goals versus values, and boom-and-bust cycles. I could relate to both concepts.
When able, I push myself, driven by a goal, without stopping to think about the impact on my values.
And I have a new one: independence.
I had this one wrapped up in authenticity. I find it amusing how values may pop up unexpectedly when they are challenged.
Community is another new one.
The trip home went like a dream: catching the 60 from Adelaide Street to Teneriffe Wharf, the ferry to Brett’s Wharf to be met by my husband and Stan, followed by a slow, controlled, supported hobble home.
I’m naming it Scout.
Motivation
Motivation feels great
when having it
Morose when I don’t
How
My
Weary
Old
Bones
‘n’ brain
Drag
When inspiration’s lacking
In this instance
Mindless sketching
Thoughts drift
Draw out syllables
Wrapping tongue
‘round sounds
Moat
Eee
Vay
Shun
Abracadabra
The most delicious chicken Tom Yum soup served in an elevated bowl surrounding a spirit burner.
Lunch with work colleagues on Thursday at Phat Elephant, Brisbane. Located on the first floor overlooking Adelaide Street and Anzac Square. It can be accessed via Post Office Square to avoid the stairs.
In Australia, today is for the dad’s.
On Friday, Carenza of Balmoral Urban Country Club, formerly School of Etiquette drove to us to deliver the “I love my Dad” bandanna before travelling overseas for their holiday, yesterday.
In his 17th year, Stan has significantly slowed down, sleeping deeply for most of the day. We caught him mid-doze for this picture. He would not usually pose.
On my graduated return to work, this week, I completed six hours on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
For two hours on Wednesday, I participated in an in-person two-hours’ workshop on improving conversations. Slido is used for participant feedback, I’m guessing to make it more accessible for everyone. I forgot and launched into a diatribe of an example of how I had fulfilled my employers goals, values, and demonstrated OARS (acronym starting O for open questions, A for affirmation, R reflecting, and S for summarising).
One of the two presenters thanked me for sharing and reminded me we were typing our responses. Whoops!
The next one, whoops that is, came when all those that were able to (I’m using a wheelie walker for mobility) needed to stand for Simon says put your hands on your head, Simon says put your hands on your shoulders, Simon says put your hands in your nose.
What an enjoyable moment until the presenter said “clap”. Guess who was the only one. Silence, faux-pas number two. Did this influence my ongoing participation? I was oblivious to the rules of Simon says. It must be five decades since I played it.
In youth
Timex ticks endlessly
Youngsters play days away
Through learning
Everything’s possible
Hands begin to speed
Teenagers’ yearning
Anything’s achievable
Young people retain potential
Become discerning
Grains slip away
Through maturescence
Candles’ burning
Commitments lead to repetition
Necessary for earning
In prime of life
Responsibilities’ concerning
Hectic pace
Life churning
Into middle age
Seasons’ turning
Tumbling to sage years
Some things no longer options
Questioning
Remembering
Shedding
Fading into
Nothing
This week a new memorial has been unveiled in Canada’s Capital Ottawa, it is dedicated to the 2SLGBTQ public servants of the Federal Government who …
Thunder Head
Fairies plum and apple bright
Tainted tarts of rhubarb grown
Atop grim reaper berries glow
Oh when will the pale girl sing
Forever splotched from juice stains
We lie hidden from drama and dreams
In the half waking light of dawn’s dusk
Abundant fuzzy peaches fly high
Among lemon scented daisy followers
Purple pringles float aimlessly in the void
Awaiting the jaws of oblivion
It’s been one of those weeks where everything hits at once. Great news: I don’t have dementia. I do have severe depression, and when physical pain and systemic frustration pile up like they have over the last few days, it takes everything not to let the weight crush you.
Last Thursday was a logistical nightmare that turned into a physical disaster. With our car in the garage, I had to rely on public transport to get to my hand therapy appointment at Brisbane Private Hospital. What should have been a simple commute became a grueling obstacle course—navigating a total of 109 stairs across the journey, including all 86 steps of Jacob’s Ladder.
Between a broken wheelchair lift, steep incline, and hauling myself up those steps one painful push at a time, my body took a beating. Stupidly, using my left hand at the first flight from Adelaide to Ann street to grip a handrail triggered sharp, shooting pains in my wrist right after making good progress in therapy. Worse, the exertion flared up excruciating pain below my right knee and a stabbing ache in my right hip, leaving my mobility severely compromised.
By the time I tried to head home, a packed bus meant no priority seating, forcing me to give up, hobble down Adelaide Street, and wait in Hutton Lane for my husband to collect me.
Adding insult to injury is the ongoing battle with the insurer. They previously denied my right hip claim, citing “no material change.” Yet the objective imaging tells a completely different story: moving from joint space reduction in late 2022 to severe, bone-on-bone contact, sclerosis, and large osteophytes by early 2026. Carrying a 6–7 kg laptop bag on a commute isn’t just an inconvenience—mechanically, it adds dynamic force to a joint that is already structurally failing.
To top off the noise, I’ve ditched Facebook and Instagram for the third time. Bluesky is a bit less satisfying, but stepping away from the main algorithmic circus feels necessary right now.
I’m resting, recovering, and preparing for my next steps. One foot in front of the other—even when every single step is a fight.
We set off from home to Brett’s Wharf, looking forward to pizza, friendly hosts, and a wine or two at Julius in Fish Lane. The ferry was late, and we were told it would be terminating at Hawthorne, with other travel options to the city to be announced.
On the way to Teneriffe, the crew let us know that due to industrial action, buses were available to take us into the city. As we’d checked only the other day, pets aren’t allowed on any other form of public transport.
We alighted at Bulimba on the promise of a 25% discount through EatClub at Romeo Italian. We ordered generously. At 1:55pm, my husband received an SMS saying we needed to pay the bill within 15 minutes to claim the discount. The payment, discount included, was declined twice — so we paid full price.
Do you think we paid $35 for an Uber Pet to take us home, or waited until the strike lifted at 4pm and put that money towards another bottle of wine?
theINFP 